Every Dick has its Day: Part 2

By regularguy13

Part 1
Part 2…

“I need a large cock,” Albert said.

His hands were jammed in his coat pockets so he didn’t touch anything. He stood in front of a glass counter shuffling his feet. The concrete floor was old and dirty. He moved out of fear that if he didn’t, all the sweat and grime of the seedy patrons would contaminate him.

He was creeped out to be in the sex shop again. It was eleven o’clock in the morning. The place looked squalid and sad.

The same overweight, depressed, crone who’d waited on him last time was there. An unfiltered cigarette dangled from her mouth. She responded to his request. “Don’t we all, hon.”

She laughed at her joke. A flicker of recognition showed in her eyes. She remembered Albert.

“Need another one so soon?” she queried.

“Yeah. The other one went over so well, I’m buying a second for some unsuspecting sorority girl as part of a Secret Santa gift exchange.”

He didn’t tell her that he’d decided to keep the other one, the monster ten-incher that he’d bought earlier and that he’d used on the four gorgeous co-eds he’d met on the subway. He hoped it would continue to be the lure that caused them to have sex with him.

The tired grandmother pulled the same two models as last time out of the case and placed the huge phalli in front of Albert. They were beige in color and over-sized versions of the male organ.

He looked in his wallet. He was running low on cash. He said, “I’ll take the smaller one.”

“Yes, sir,” the toothless sales clerk said.

She took his money and returned with his change. She put the fake prick in a plain paper bag and Albert was on his way to the subway. This time he looked both ways before stepping off the sidewalk.

He didn’t trust the flashing crosswalk sign that beckoned all pedestrians to cross the busy avenue because last time, a cyclist ignored the signal and ran him over.

He returned to his room in the frat house. He wrapped the novelty item in festive holiday paper, had lunch with some fraternity brothers, and then, did some school work.

Two hours later, he closed the book he’d been reading for his Western Civilization class, yawned, and stretched. His mind drifted. He reminisced about last night, which had been the most amazing night of his life.

He said out loud, “Did that happen to me? Yes. I fucked four beautiful women.”

He smiled, recalling the “perfect storm”, the improbable sequence of events the led to his bedding the beauties.

“Should I attempt to deceive them again?” Albert asked himself. “Hell yes!” he answered.

“Their lust and intoxicated state allowed me to trick them last time. What’s the chance that I can pull it off again?”

He stood, paced about his room, and answered his own question.

“Zero? Maybe one in a million. But the reward! Sweet Jesus! The reward is so great! Primo pussy the likes of which a geek like me will never have the chance to sample again unless I become a billionaire.”

He sat and considered the issue.

“How can I prevent them from discovering I’m a fraud? I needed to be smart and lucky. My biggest hurdle is to overcome their natural curiosity and desire to see, touch and suck on the big unit. I have to convince them to have sex in positions where they can’t see that I’m masturbating them with a dildo.

“Control. I have to be in control,” he concluded.

“I want to try and have sex with them again, but I don’t t know their last names or anyone’s phone number. I do know where they live. I’ll go to their place.”

He grabbed his wallet, keys and the massively thick, ten-inch dildo. He shoved it down the front of his pants. He put on his winter coat. It was long enough to hide the bulge in his pants. He marched out of the room saying, “I have to try.”

As he walked across campus to the subway, he began humming “The Impossible Dream” a song from the play “Man of La Mancha”. It seemed appropriate. To bolster his resolve, he sang in a low voice,

“This is my quest

To follow that star

No matter how hopeless

No matter how far

To fight for the right

Without question or pause

To be willing to march into Hell

For a heavenly cause

And I know if I’ll only be true

To this glorious quest

That my heart will lie peaceful and calm

When I’m laid to my rest

And the world will be better for this

That one man, scorned and covered with scars

Still strove with his last ounce of courage

To reach the unreachable star.”

Not surprisingly, Albert received many odd looks from other pedestrians. Who goes around in public singing? He was given a wide berth by students who worried that he might be dangerous, deranged, or on drugs.

“Hey, Albert. Why are you singing? Are you a theater major or planning on trying out for a play?” a cute co-ed asked him.

She stepped in front of him, forcing him to stop. He’d been so focused on his mission, his quixotic quest for pussy, that he didn’t realize that he had been singing out loud. He was embarrassed, flustered, and stuttered, “Ah. Ah. Ah.”

The young college student thought he was babbling because he didn’t recognize her. She said, “It’s Lulu.”

His face was blank. She gave him more clues to jog his memory.

“Lulu? We hooked up in your bed two months ago? I was drunk and wouldn’t leave.”

She was unembarrassed by her words. She continued to rattle on. “You probably don’t recognize me because I’ve lost weight and changed the color of my hair.”

She pulled the hood of her coat down and shook her head. Long locks of beautiful, thick, luxurious, chestnut brown hair spilled out past her shoulders. Her hair was gorgeous. Red and gold undertones highlighted her rich, dark brown hair.

She ran her fingers through it and said, “This is my natural color. I was going through a blond phase when we had sex.”

“Yes. Lulu. I remember. Hello.”

The girl had no filter. Words gushed from her mouth. “I’ve dropped twenty pounds. I swear half of it must have come from my boobs. They’re gone. Thank goodness my stomach and thighs are slimmer. My ass looks fantastic if I do say so myself.

“I’ve been eating better. I exercise. I’m taking care of myself. Two months ago, I was in a bad place. I didn’t like who I was. I was doing stupid things like having meaningless sex with jerks who didn’t care about me.

“I was a chunky, disgusting slut with no self-esteem. The night we met, I let Franklin and Marshall spit roast me. Marshal fucked me while I sucked Franklin’s dick. Franklin came in my mouth and then pulled out and shot his load on my face and tits. But you knew that. You accidentally lick his spunk off my nipple.”

Albert grimaced at the memory and wondered, “How can I get away from her?” He looked at his watch and said, “Lulu, I have somewhere I have to be.”

“Sure. I’ll let you go.” She put her hood up. She reached out to him and touched his arm. She gave him a serious look and said, “Albert, I want you to know, I’m not the drunken, skanky whore I was. Thank you for treating me kindly. I liked the way you kissed me.”

She stopped talking and hurried away. Albert was left standing there wondering, “What the hell was that all about?”.

He put it out of his mind. He re-focused on his quest. He wanted to see the hot girls again. When he last saw Savannah, she’d agreed to go to his frat’s Christmas party. If she’d meant it, he’d have a chance to fuck her again.

He took the subway, got off at the right stop and walked to their apartment. Joanie answered the door and cried out, “Dick! What a nice surprise.” She hugged him.

Albert was nervous. He was always uncomfortable in the presence of pretty women. He returned the hug and mumbled, “Emm. My name is Albert.”

She laughed and slid a lecherous hand down his body. She squeezed the big lump in his pants and said, “Right. The girls and I have been calling you “Dick”. Is that okay?”

“Ah. Sure.” he acquiesced without a protest. He said to himself, “I guess I can’t complain about being objectified. The only reason they spoke to me and let me have sex with them was because I had a giant dildo in my pants and they thought it was real.”

He said, “I would have called, but I don’t have anyone’s phone number.”

“We’ll fix that. Come in. Did you miss me?” she asked flirting with him. She had enjoyed fucking him. She was angling for a second ride on his monster dick.

He was no dummy. He gave the correct answer, “Of course, I miss you.”

“I hear that after you had sex with me, you plundered all the girls.”

Albert blushed. His face turned bright red.

She laughed and said, “Hey! Don’t be embarrassed. If I had the chance to sleep with four hot men in one night, I would. Ha! Come to think of it, I have.”

His face got redder.

“Really. It’s okay. We’re young and unattached. There’s no reason we can’t have fun. And believe me, my roommates and I had a great time with you. There’s no jealousy. No hurt feelings. Take off your coat. Want a beer?”

He removed his coat and said, “Sure.”

She went to the refrigerator and returned with two brews. “Let’s sit on the sofa,” she said. They sat. He took a large swig to wet his parched throat and ease his nerves.

She took a drink and sat her bottle down. She slid over next to him. She was practically on top of him. Her breast mashed into his arm. Her hand gently brushed his cheek. The beautiful blond said in a husky whisper, “So you missed me?”

“Uh huh.” He could only croak in response.

“We have the place to ourselves,” she announced and then, she kissed him. It was a wonderful thing to be kissed by this beautiful woman. Albert felt giddy.

He hadn’t planned to hook up with her. He hadn’t dared to hope that he’d sleep with any of the beauties today, but given this opening, he went for it. They made out on the couch. The kisses were hard and hungry. He pawed at her chest. She rubbed his crotch. Lust overtook them.

To prevent him from damaging her nice top, she removed it and her bra. “Let me get this out of your way,” she said.

Now that he had unfettered access, he pounced on her boobs. He crawled on top of her, groped the ample flesh, and sucked on her hard, pink nipples.

“Oh. Emmm,” she moaned and held his head to her bosom.

She didn’t stop him when he slid a hand up her skirt and pressed his fingers against her damp panties. In fact, she rejoiced, “Oh! God! Yes. We need to move to my bedroom.”

They adjourned to the private space, leaving their shirts and her bra behind. He closed the door and turned to see her disrobing. She tossed aside her skirt and underwear and now completely nude, climbed into bed. He kicked off his shoes and hopped on the bed in eager pursuit of her.

As he kissed her mouth and caressed her breasts, she unzipped his fly and attempted to snake her hand into his pants and touch his ten-inch cock.

“Whoa. Hold on,” he protested.

“I want to see it, feel it, and kiss it,” she whined.

He twisted his body to get away from her. He got out of bed, paced, and thought, “I can’t let that happen.”. He saw her robe and a lavender-colored sleeping mask casually resting on a chair in front of her dressing table. He went over and picked up the night blindfold.

“Joanie,” he said. He used the commanding voice that had worked for him the last time they’d had sex. “You know the rules. Seeing it will scare you. Here, put this on.” He handed her the sleeping mask.

She made a face and then, put on the blindfold. “Kinky. This could be fun,” she said.

“Yes. Exactly. Kinky,” he said, embracing and supporting her comment. “Keep the blindfold on my hot, sexy girl.”

He sat on the bed, guided her onto her back, and said, “Spread your legs.”

She giggled knowing what was coming next. He didn’t disappoint. He dove between her legs and licked her hairless sex.

“Ohhh,” she groaned. “God! That’s wonderful.”

Albert got down to business and ate her pussy with the enthusiasm of a grateful geek who worried he’d never have this chance again. He was thorough. He was willing to put in the time. It would get her body ready for the huge dildo and, he figured, it would distract her. He reasoned, if she was focused on climaxing, she’d be less inclined to demand to see the giant cock.

His active fingers, tongue, and lips had her vagina weeping. Fluid gushed out of her tasty snatch. Moans and sighs poured out of her mouth. Her hips rocked rapidly as her mind dreamed about the big dick she thought he possessed.

“Oh. Oh. God! I’m ready. Fuck me!” she pleaded.

He smiled, pleased that he’d driven to this desperate state. He rolled her over onto her stomach and said, “Get on your knees.”

“No, not doggie-style again. I’m worried you’ll pound me and punch me in the cervix.”

“Fuck! What now!” he shouted in his mind. His mind raced. He recalled a position called “The Sidekick”. Ever the diligent student, he’d looked up “Best sex positions for a big dick”. He’d memorized the ones that didn’t allow the woman to see the man.

“I have the perfect solution. You’ll love this one. It limits how deep I can penetrate you and it’ll stimulate your G-spot. You just lay there. I’ll do all the work. You focus on your pleasure. This isn’t going to be a quick fuck. I’ll take my time and blow your mind with gentle, sensual thrusts.”

“Emm. Sounds good.”

“Lay on your stomach. Stretch your left arm straight up. Bend your right arm and right leg. Bring them up like you’re crawling.”

He got up on his knees and helped her position herself as he had requested.

“Great. That’s it. Keep your weight on your left side. Rest your head on your left arm. I’ll straddle your left leg. When I enter you, my cock will rub the front wall of your vagina and your G-spot.”

While he talked, he gently rubbed her slim ass. He also leaned forward to make sure the blindfold was in place. It was.

“That sounds great,” she said.

Albert was pleased with her level of compliance and cooperation. He decided he could risk fucking her. He quickly undid his belt and pulled down his pants and underwear. His small unit was hard and ready.

His hand caressed her labia. He inserted a finger in her hot, weeping pussy. He said, “Almost ready. I’ll open you more and apply some lube.”

He leaned in so he could fuck her with his small dick. One hand reached out to the bed to support his weight and the other grabbed his cock and slipped it into her molten hole.

It took all of his self-control not to moan and not to slam his prick into her. He kept his body off her as he fucked her. With his small dick that was no easy feat.

“Oh, God! Oh, God!” he cried out in his mind. He hurriedly fucked her slipping two inches of his slim cock into her pussy. He was nervous, scared, excited and overwhelmed by the wondrous sensation that came from fucking this beautiful blond.

He didn’t last long. “Ohh,” he cried out softly as he climaxed. He struggled to breathe quietly, not to cry out announcing his orgasm and not to jab his cock as deep as he could inside her.

“Err. There. That ought to do it,” he said.

He sat down on her thigh and as quietly as he could, he took a couple of deep, calming breaths. While he did so, he caressed her ass with the giant dildo and then, he teased her by pressing it against her opening.

“Emm,” she sighed and wiggled her butt against the monster cock. She said, “Hello, big fellow. I’m ready.”

Albert pushed it in.

“Ohh. Crap! I thought I was ready.”

He stopped. The head was barely inside her.

“Fuck me! That’s a big dick!” she exclaimed.

Worried for her safety, Albert began to pull the dildo out. She objected, “No. Don’t remove it. I’ll adjust.”

She took a deep breath and said, “OK. Slide it in nice and slow.”

Albert was gentle and patient. Her pussy stretched to accommodate the thick unit. Her sighs and groans of discomfort morphed into coos and moans of pleasure.

“Oh! Oh!”

He slipped the massive dildo in slowly and smoothly. She loved it. The stretching. The friction. The way her vaginal wall and G-spot were caressed, stroked, and polished. She basked in the good feelings that built slowly, then, bubbled over in a powerful explosion that wracked her body. She convulsed. Her whole body trembled as she orgasmed.

“Oh. Oh! Ohhhhh!”

He joined her and cried out faking his climax, “Oh! Oh! Fuck!”

Then, Albert stayed his hand and left seven inches of thick, slick silicone in her pussy. She luxuriated in the joy that engulfed her whole body.

Albert considered himself a gentleman. He told himself, “Under normal circumstances, I’d stay still, be quiet and let her enjoy the moment, but this is far from a normal situation. If she turns around, she’ll catch me red-handed with the dildo”.

He quickly pulled the fake dick out and hurriedly dressed. He shoved the phallus into his pants while she was lost in her pleasure.

She awoke and pleaded, “Don’t go!”. She turned and reached for him.

He made sure the dildo was hidden. Then, he looked in awe at her beautiful face and perky tits. “My God! You’re a beautiful woman,” he said. He meant every word.

She smiled, accepted his compliment, and returned one. “You have a great cock and know how to make love to a woman.”

He came to her and they kissed. The greedy bastard that he was, he copped a feel of her breasts and thumbed her erect nipples.

The door to her bedroom opened and her roommates stuck their heads in. Albert was glad he’d put the dildo away.

The other girls smiled mischievously. Cassie said, “I knew it. When I saw your bra on the living room floor, I knew you were fucking ‘The Dick’.

Albert blushed. Joanie faced her friends unembarrassed. She didn’t care that she was naked or that she had cum running out of her hole. She said, “Yes and It was wonderful.”

“Can I have a turn?” Mei Ling asked politely.

“No. Sorry. I have to leave,” Albert said. He didn’t want to push his luck. He put on his shirt and said, “I came over because I didn’t have anyone’s phone number. My frat is having a Christmas party this Friday. Savannah and I talked about attending.

“Savannah, do you want to go with me?”

Savannah was slow to answer. She was drunk the other night when she agreed. She was happy to bed Albert, but she had no interest in dating him. She gave him the fake smile she used to let boys down gently and said,

“Dick, I mean Albert, you’ve had sex with all of us. I think we should keep things casual and be non-exclusive.”

Her roommates felt the same way. They’d discussed the time they spent with him. The general consensus was that he was a fun fuck, but not serious boyfriend material.

Cassie said, “Albert, We all like being with you. We’re happy to share with you. How about the four of us go to your party?”

To show they were in agreement, Mei-Ling asked, “What time does it start?”

“Nine o’clock. This Friday.”

Joan asked, “How should we dress?”

“Anything Christmassy.”

They exchanged phone numbers and agreed to meet at the party. Albert returned to school. He was pleased he’d see them again, grateful that he’d banged Joanie again, and he looked forward to Friday night.


Friday, Albert had a horrible day. In the morning, he was called on in his Calculus class to share his answer on the assigned homework. He did and everyone laughed. He screwed it up royally and the teaching assistant made fun of him.

After class, he returned to the frat house. He sat with his brothers and ate lunch.

The president came in and said, “Boys, as you know tonight we’re having our Christmas party.”

A cheer went up in the hall. The president, waved his arms, to quiet the crowd and said, “That’s the good news. The bad news is we have to get this place ready.

“Seniors will handle the drinks. Juniors and sophomores are in charge of music and decorations. Freshman will clean our house. Check the bulletin board for your assignment.”


After lunch, Albert went to the board. “Great. I have the main floor bathroom.”

He went to the bathroom. It was a mess and smelled bad. Giving it a once over was not an option. “Phew!” Albert said. “This is a hazardous zone that’ll require scouring and sanitizing.”

He went to the custodian’s closet, grabbed rubber gloves, a mop and cleaning supplies. He spent the next hour cleaning the 6′ x 8′ space until it shined.

When he was done, he put everything away. He said to one of the other pledges, “That was gross. I breathed in so much bleach, I don’t think I have any hair in my nostrils.”

He put out a plastic yellow sign that announced, “Wet Floor”. He said to everyone in earshot. “Don’t go in there. This bathroom is off limits to you barbarians. I mean it!”

After dinner, he shaved, showered and dressed for the party. His Christmassy attire consisted of khaki’s, a blue buttondown shirt, and a loud, ridiculous tie showing Santa, his sleigh, and the reindeer.

An upper-classman stuck his head in Albert’s room and said, “You’re in charge of the music for the first half of the party. Charlie will relieve you.”

Albert went to the party room at 8:45 p.m. He played tunes to an empty room. An hour later, only a handful of people were there. No one was dancing. The voices of their conversation bounced off the walls.

Around ten o’clock the older frat boys made an appearance. More invitees streamed in. Albert kept his eyes open for his four friends.

By 11:30 p.m., a good size crowd was there. The party was in full force. People were dancing, drinking, and talking. In general, having a good time. Albert’s tour of duty playing music was over and he joined the party.

He hadn’t seen his new friends. He got another beer and walked the room, searching for them. They weren’t there.

“Hello, Albert,” said a cute girl wearing a Christmas elf costume. It was Lulu. She’d hoped to have a chance to talk to Albert. She wanted him to see how good she looked now that she’d lost weight.

“Hi, Lulu,” said. Then he did a double take.

She was wearing a fetching outfit. The top was green with fake, white fur circling her wrists and neck. It was cute, Christmassy, but did nothing special for her small chest.

However, she had leggings on her lower body. That’s where he was staring. It wasn’t the green and red stripes that caught his attention. It was the skintight material that accented her curves.

The spandex hugged her slim legs and clung to her fabulous ass. It also gave her a camel toe. He could make out the general shape of her vulva through the tight-fitting fabric.

“Wow! Great outfit, Lulu,” Albert said. He was impressed with her smaller, fitter body.

She touched her felt elf hat and made the bells jingle. “Thanks,” she said with a smile. She slowly spun around so he could have a good look at the whole costume.

He ogled her. She was proud of how hot she looked. The leggings did a magnificent job showing off her exceptional butt. They both were pleased with how she looked.

“Wow! Lulu,” Albert exclaimed again.

“Please call me Mary. My real name is Mary Jones. I’m an ordinary girl from a small town. My dad works in a factory. Mom’s a teacher.”

Albert listened intently as she made her confession.

“When I came to college, I foolishly decided I needed to re-invent myself. I wanted everyone to see that I was interesting, worldly, and special. I dyed my hair blond and became “Lulu”, the devil-may-care adventuress.

“She’s unpredictable, audacious, and sexual. The kind of woman who has sex at the drop of a hat. Threesomes? Bring it on.

“I’ve realized that that was stupid. I wasn’t happy pretending to be someone I’m not. All that happened was I met a lot of phony people, got drunk and had meaningless sex.

“You were the best man I met. You were the only one to cuddle me after sex. I woke up happy to be spooned against you. It was nice.”

Albert didn’t know what to say. What she’d said was some heavy shit. It was real and honest.

She’d expected that he’d be stunned. It was a lot to get off her chest. She smiled, stuck out her hand and said, “I’m having a do-over. Hi. My name is Mary. I’m a brown-haired, brown-eyed, smalltown girl here to get a teaching degree.”

He smiled and shook her hand. They chatted more. Albert discovered that she was very easy to talk to. He didn’t get overly nervous like he usually did when he was around girls. She asked questions. He answered and asked her about herself, school and future plans. Albert enjoyed their conversation while keeping an eye out for the hotties.

Mary noticed that he periodically scanned the room. She asked, “Who are you looking for?”

“I invited some people, women, I met on the subway to this party. I told them it started at nine. It’s midnight. I guess they didn’t come.”

They heard a roar. The guys were clapping and cheering. Mary and Albert turned to see what the ruckus was all about. It was the four hotties. They were dressed to kill. They were also drunk.

Cassie shouted, “Dick! Dick! Where are you?”

Albert said to Mary, “Excuse me. They are my guests.”

He hurried over to them calling out, “Hello, I’m here.”

Mary and the others were surprised that the four beautiful women were searching for the scrawny freshman. The women rushed up to him, hugged and kissed him. Cassie announced in a loud voice, “Dick, take me to your room. It’s my turn for sex.”

That surprised the crowd. Some people were speechless. Others cheered. All the guys were jealous and wondered, “Why him? What does he have that I don’t?” Of course, the answer was a thick, ten-inch long dildo. Albert had it hidden under his bed.

Cassie latched on to Albert and had him take her to his room. The other three ladies found admirers to get them drinks and to dance with.

As they went to his room, he had to fend off her efforts to grab his crotch. He successfully managed to keep her from discovering he wasn’t hung like a horse. He got her inside and locked the door.

Cassie screamed, “Whip it out! I want to see your big dick!”

He tried to calm her down. He said, “That’s not how it works. Get undressed.”

The drunken woman kicked off her shoes and started stripping. She lost her balance while peeling off her red thong. Albert caught her, placed her on his bed and took off the flimsy garment.

“My head is spinning,” she said and laughed.

While she was lying on her stomach chuckling, he reached under the bed, got the dildo and shoved it in his pants. Then, he sat on the bed, caressed her ass and said, “Turn over Cassie. I’ll eat your pussy ’til you cum and then we’ll fuck.”


She rolled over. Albert stared at the beautiful brunette’s face and then, his eyes moved down her gorgeous body to her full bosom. Her dark nipples were hard. Her legs were open. Her wondrous, bald sex was on display. He looked adoringly at her pussy. Then, he dove in because he loved to eat pussy and he wanted to distract her before she demanded to see his cock.

“Oh, yeah!” she groaned.

He licked her everywhere. She grew warm and her pussy became wet. Her hips rocked and her throat issued groans and moans. His tongue circled her nub. Two fingers entered her and rubbed her G-spot.

“Yeah! There. That!”

He did as he was told and gave her a joyous climax.

“Oh. Oh! OH! OHHH!”

Her hands clenched and gripped the sheets while her vagina clenched and gripped his fingers.

Albert withdrew his fingers. He took advanced of her dazed state and rolled her over onto her stomach. He slipped a pillow under her hips. He got on his knees behind her and pressed his hips and, more importantly, the huge dildo, against her ass.

“That’s what I want!” she exclaimed, feeling the giant cock.

“Patience, precious. Let me give you some lube.”

He pulled his pants and underwear down. He rubbed her thighs with the fake phallus.

“Emmm.” she moaned in anticipation.

He moved the big, silicone dick away and leaned in, and inserted his penis into her hot vagina. He was fully hard and it slid in easily. For him, it was heavenly. For her, it was nothing special.

He’d touched her with the fake dick to re-assure her that it was there, ready, and would soon be pleasuring her. She didn’t find it reassuring. She found it maddening to be teased. She was so annoyed that she got up on her knees.

“Hey! No!” Albert screamed as his partner bucked him to the side.

She turned and said, “Where is it? I have to see it!”

She did. She saw Albert holding a giant dildo and his slim, short penis pointing skyward. The tip was slick and shiny because it was covered with her vaginal juice.

They were both silent for a beat. Albert was scared to death.

“WHAT!” She was stunned that the guy she and her friend called “Dick” was a fraud.

“What the hell!” Her anger boiled over. She slapped his tiny penis.

“Ouch,” Albert screamed.

Both hands went to protect his manhood. He dropped the dildo. She picked it up, looked it over and then, began hitting him with it as she cursed him.

“You bastard! You tricked me. You puny dick deceiver!”

She pummeled Albert. He cried out in pain. She cried out in anger. Her rage wasn’t diminishing. She got off the bed, grabbed the small man by the wrist and dragged him from the room.

“You faker! I’m going to expose you.”

Albert shuffled awkwardly behind the naked woman. He struggled not to fall. He was incapable of stopping her. They were of equal height and weight and she was motivated. She was like a woman possessed. She yanked him mightily and he stumbled along behind her.

They burst into the main room, causing quite a commotion. They grabbed everyone’s attention. She was nude and cursing like a sailor. He was nearly nude. His tiny pecker bobbed about. She was waving the silicone dick and called to her friends.

“Savannah! Mei Ling! Joanie! This guy’s a sham. He doesn’t have a big dick. He tricked us using this dildo. He’s not hung like a horse. He’s hung like a hamster!”

Some of the crowd laughed and pointed at Albert. Others stared at the beautiful, nude, angry woman. The roommates ran up to Cassie. They looked at the dildo and then, at the little man with the little dick, and they became incensed.

Mei Ling got in Albert’s face and said, “You fucked me with a dildo!” She slapped him.

“I let you have sex with me!” Savannah yelled. She was upset about letting the scrawny freshman with the scrawny penis into her bed.

Joanie stared daggers at him.

Albert said, “I never said I had a big dick. You invited me to your apartment and into your bed.”

Joanie grabbed the dildo from Cassie and shook it in his face. “Beautiful girls like us don’t have sex with lowly creatures like you unless you have a big cock!”

She slapped him in the face with the fake phallus and shouted, “Girls, we are out of here!”

He fell and landed on his butt. They marched to his room. Cassie got dressed and they left.

Albert was thoroughly embarrassed. It was his worst nightmare. He was naked in public. Everyone could see his little dick. His secret was exposed.

The crowd showed him no mercy. They pointed, laughed and made fun of him.

“Hey, anyone lost their ChapStick? I see one.”

“Is that a roll of Certs or the littlest penis in the world!”

“He has a travel-size penis!”

“Dude, when you go swimming in cold water, does your dick get bigger?”

“What’s the difference between Albert’s dick and a joke? No one laughs at his jokes.”

Albert’s face turned red. He endured a chorus of insults from the mob.

“Teenie Weenie Peenie.” “Needle dick.” “Gherkin guy.” “Mr. Baby Carrot.” “Micropenis.” “Minidick.” “Short shaft.” “He has baby dick syndrome.” “Inchworm.” “That’s a little pecker.” “He’s a one-inch wonder!”

Mary felt sorry for him. She turned away and left the party.

Albert scrambled to his feet, pulled up his pants, and ran toward his room. He planned to hide. Forever. He heard Cassie and her friends inside.

“I can’t go in there,” he told himself. He slipped into the custodian’s closet where he sat on the sink and waited for the women to leave. Then, he locked himself in his room.


Saturday around noon, there was a knock at Albert’s door. He ignored it.

“Albert, it’s Mary. Mary Jones.”

He hesitated.

She said, “Open the door. You can’t hide forever.”

To himself, he said, “Yes. I can.”

She knocked louder and said, “I have food.”

His stomach rumbled. He was hungry. He hadn’t eaten breakfast. He opened his door. Mary gave the disheveled, deeply embarrassed man a friendly smile.

“Hi,” she said. She walked to his desk and laid out the fast food she’d brought. The smell of grilled onions and French fries assaulted his nose. His mouth watered. He picked up a burger and took a bite.

“Thanks,” he said.

They sat on his bed and ate without speaking. When the last fry was gone, Albert said, “I’m so embarrassed. Humiliated. Everyone saw me naked and saw… You know.”

She nodded.

He sighed loudly and said, “I’m also sorry that I took advantage of Joanie, Cassie, Mei Ling and Savannah. I deceived them.”

He spilled his guts to Mary. He told her the whole story. From buying the gag gift, being run over by a cyclist, meeting the co-eds on the subway, the misunderstanding and how he let them think he had a huge cock so he could have sex with the women.

She listened. She never interrupted him. When the story was done, he asked, “Am I a terrible person?”

“A situation presented itself to you and you took advantage of it. You didn’t hurt or abuse them. You gave them what they wanted, a big dick experience. It was shallow but for all parties. You don’t need to worry about them. They’ll get over it and I don’t think they’ll have trouble getting another guy.

“I’m worried about you. Are you going to continue to live a life of shame and self-loathing?”

“Huh?” he uttered confused.

“You need to accept your body. You can’t change it. So you either are ashamed and hate yourself or you accept your dick is what it is and get on with your life.”

He was still bewildered.

She tried a different tack to explain her point. She asked, “Am I a terrible, disgusting person?”


“I’ve been fat. I’ve been a slut.”

“You’ve been nice to me and you’re easy to talk to.”

“So you can have compassion for me? You forgive me my flaws and imperfections. Why can’t you accept your flaws? I have small breasts. You have a small penis. Does that have to define us? Must we hide?

“If I made a mistake, wouldn’t you tell me to pick myself up and carry on? You’d be kind, sympathetic and gentle. You wouldn’t berate and punish me. Be kind to yourself. There’s more to you than the size of your dick.”

He got her point. He felt better. He felt better still when she sat beside him and kissed him. She embraced him and they kissed again. She nudged him. He lay on his back. She got on top of him and they kissed more.

Kissing led to touching. Their clothes were in the way so they were discarded. Naked, he rolled over and put her on her back. Her long, chestnut brown hair spilled out and surrounded her head like a shining halo.

He kissed and sucked on her taut nipples. Her breasts were small, firm, soft, and fun.

“You’re beautiful,” he said. “I love your petite breasts and hard nipples.”

She smiled, accepted his compliment, and said with a laugh, “Thanks. There are some benefits to having small breasts. I don’t have to wear a bra. They are so uncomfortable. And, I don’t think I have to worry about sagging boobs being an issue for me.”

She grabbed his head and pulled it to her tit. “That felt nice. Suck on me some more.”

He nursed at her breasts and playfully nipped her nips.


“Sorry. I’ll stop biting.”

“No. Don’t. It’s hard to explain. It hurts, but in a good way.”

“Okay,” he responded. He began pulling, pinching and softly biting her nipples.

“Ahhh. Ohhh!” she moaned. Her pussy creamed. She grew warm all over. She enjoyed it and wanted to give him pleasure. She wriggled out from under him. She grabbed his pint-size cock and shoved it in her mouth.

“Ohhhh!” It was his turn to groan with pleasure.

[table “38” not found /]

She found it easy to give him head. Her mouth wasn’t forced open wider than was comfortable. Her jaw didn’t ache. She didn’t gag. She was having so much fun sucking him off, she was caught by surprise when he came into her mouth.

“Oh. Oh! God! Sorry!” he cried out as he shot off.

“Eek!,” she squeaked in surprise. She gulped and swallowed. She nursed on the shrinking unit until it was too much stimulation for him and he pulled it out of her mouth.

“Too much,” he cried. He lay on his back. His heart raced. He was breathing hard. She put her head on his chest, looked up at his face, and smiled like the Cheshire cat.

“Sorry I came without warning you,” he apologized.

“It was too good, huh?” she teased. “I’m too good?”

“Yes and yes.”

“No problem. I got carried away. Your dick is so suckable. It’s the perfect size for a blowjob.”

He gave her a look that said, “Right. I don’t believe you”.

“I’m not patronizing you. A girl’s mouth is only so big. With you it was comfortable. I didn’t have to worry about my teeth scraping your dick or if I was going to dislocate my jaw trying to accommodate a super thick penis.”

He said, “Sorry for being self-conscious about my size. I’m glad it was easy for you. It was great for me.”

She rolled over onto her back and spread her legs. She giggled and said, “If you want to make it up to me, eat my peach.”

He smiled and got between her legs. Her pussy was bald. He licked and kissed it. He slurped her nectar, She was as juicy and sweet as a peach. He made her orgasm. Then, he waited five seconds and tongued her clit until she orgasmed again.

“Ohh. Fuck! Enough!” she pushed his head away after the second climax. She rolled onto her side. Her thighs clenched together and she basked in the waves of pleasure that flowed through her body.

He smiled, pleased with himself, and snuggled up behind her. They spooned. His arm was draped over her as she experienced her bliss. Time passed.

“Wow! I didn’t expect two,” she said after she recovered.

“You inspire me to greatness.”

“Ha!” she guffawed. She wiggled her butt. “What’s this? Do you have something for me?”

She grabbed his dick, slotted it at her opening and pushed her butt back claiming his cock. She was wet. His slim dick slipped in easily.

“Oh.” she cried out. Not in pleasure, but in surprise. She didn’t feel anything. She hadn’t expected to scream “Oh my God! You’re splitting me in two.” But, she had expected to feel something.

He said, “I know. You want to ask me ‘Is it in?’.”

“No,” she said not wanting to hurt his feelings. Then being truthful, she said, “Yes.”.

He pulled back and thrust into her a couple of times. “Honestly, I don’t feel much either.”

He moved and knelt sitting on his heels beside her. She rolled onto her back. Her tits disappeared. Self-conscious, she put her hands over her boobs.

He said, “I like you. Relationships are about a lot of things: being kind, attentive, and compromising. I think honesty is the key.”

He pried her hands from her chest exposing her flat chest. “You have small breasts. Please don’t feel bad or that you’re not a woman. To me, you’re sexy and wonderful.”

He raised up showing her his small penis. “This is me. We can have fun and good sex, but some positions aren’t going to work for us. Spooning sex, you on top, and straight missionary are out. We have to choose positions that maximize my length and your tightness.”

He slid a pillow under her ass and knelt between her thighs. “Pull your knees to your chest.” She did. He took her ankles and placed them on his shoulder. Then he guided his penis into her vagina. He penetrated her deeply.

“Ohh,” she exclaimed.

“Yeah. Better, right?”

She smiled and said, “Yes.”

He fucked her vigorously. He pulled and pinched her nipples and he rubbed her clit until she screamed, “Oh. Oh. Yes. Ohhh!”

He pounded her as she climaxed and fired off into her pussy. She froze. He fell over and lay beside her. They both were lost in pleasure.

When they recovered, she smiled and said, “Three orgasms in one night. A new record.”

They kissed. Then he asked, “So it was good?”


“Good. Because that’s how I like my girlfriend. Satisfied.”

Tears welled up in her eyes. “You don’t mind dating a former fat slut?”

“No. Do you object to dating a guy who probably has the smallest penis on campus?


She reached for him and hugged him. Moments later, she began to giggle.

“What are you laughing about?” he asked.

“I listed some benefits of having small breasts and I told you your dick is the perfect size for me to blow. I just thought of another benefit of a dick your size.”


“I’ve always wanted to try anal sex, but have been afraid. I think you would be perfect for me and I could give you a tighter hole and one no one has ever had.”

He looked at her and said, “You’ve never done it?”

“No. I turned them down every time. You?”

“I’ve rarely had intercourse. I’ve never had anal sex. I’d like to with you.”

They kissed deeply and passionately. When they stopped, she said, “What are you doing later tonight?”

“Your ass!”

The End.


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