teenie_weenie_peenie

My friend had to visit Portland for some work, and I decided to accompany him on a small overnight road-trip there. We ended up sharing a room at a motel. I guess I forgot to lock the bathroom door, and he stumbled in while I was drying myself after a shower. He must have gotten a pretty good look at my chode then, but didn’t say anything at the time.

Later that night, while in bed, he asked me if I had any “medical problems”. I didn’t get what exactly he meant to ask and asked him to elaborate. At which he told me that he’d seen my dick in the bathroom earlier, and that he thought I might have some hormonal issues which could be the reason for my baby dick(I am ~3.5″ in length when erect, but about a centimeter or less when flaccid. The flaccid length is what my friend saw). I told him that there weren’t any “medical issues”(there really aren’t) and that it was just that small naturally.

He seemed pretty amused at that and told me that he had a cock that size when he was 10. He also asked me if my girlfriend was happy with my size, but since I hadn’t head any complaints at the time, I smugly told him that I could please her pretty well. He asked me about my size, and boasted about being double my size, if not more.

Now I’ve known for quite some time now that I have a small pecker and have come to accept it. The fact that my girlfriend(we’ve been dating for over 3 years now) also never complained had made me complacent about my size. But this was a friend I’d known since childhood, and him knowing my biggest shame was humiliating. We’d always been “bros” and equals before this, but after that day I haven’t looked at him the same way, knowing that he is most probably packing double the length of meat that I am. And judging from his smirks whenever something about anything being “small sized” is mentioned in my presence, he doesn’t look at me the same way either.

My girlfriend and I are meeting him and a few other friends for drinks later tonight. I am dreading that this penis size topic will come up there, and at the same time I hope that it does come up, I have started to savor the teasing and humiliation now. Pretty conflicting emotions, does anyone else here know what I’m talking about?

Before this episode, I’ve never really been into SPH (though I always knew I had a small dick). But somehow my friend teasing me and his knowing looks whenever we’ve met after that get me really excited. I’ve looked up a lot of SPH porn in the past two weeks, and I realized that what turns me on the most is when it’s a cocky big dick alpha male guy doing the teasing, as opposed to a female. Didn’t find a lot of that. Any links will be appreciated.

PS – Will update if the penis size topic does come up while we’re out, provided people are interested in this post.

UPDATE: So, the penis size topic did come up last weekend, and came up big time. It started when we all ordered shots and my girlfriend’s order came in a shot-glass that was significantly bigger than our glasses. She looks at me and says, “There is no way I’ll be able to handle so much!” or at least something pretty similar. My friend looks me straight in the eye and goes, “That’s definitely the first time you’ve heard that, right?” and then just burst out laughing and kept at it for a good minute or more. I just looked sheepish and mumbled a “Yes, true that” or something along those lines. I guess all my other friends are either too daft or they just wanted to have more fun at my expense that day, and insisted my friend tell then what he meant and why he was laughing so much.

So, my friend goes ahead and tells them the entire story in all its gory detail. About how when he first walked in, all he could see was my balls, before he noticed the button “he[I] call(s) his[my] dick”(his words), about how he ACTUALLY thought I might have a medical issue and how it was the size of his dick when he hadn’t even hit puberty. The others asked him to tell them how big it was, and he held his fingers about an inch apart(in reality, that was being generous). The other guys(my girlfriend happened to be the only female that day) were pretty incredulous and burst out laughing. Then there were the usual penis jokes(“For him, it’s a peanut, not a penis”, “So do your nuts get wet when you pee”, “No dude, if its really that small I’m pretty sure he has to sit down to pee” and a few others like those).

They then asked my girlfriend for confirmation, and like the good girlfriend she is, she initially just hemmed and hawed, and made the usual noises about size not being everything. But I presume being tipsy made the guys relentless, and they continued asking her about my size. Eventually she showed them two fingers maybe a cm apart, significantly closer than what my friend had shown them, and for a moment they all just went silent from the surprise, after which started round two of my teasing.

After a couple more drinks, my girlfriend mustered the courage to ask the guys their sizes. Boy oh boy was that embarrassing for me! The smallest guy said he was 6.5″ which gave him a good 3″ over me. The friend who outed me said he was a good 7-7.5″. Admittedly, it is totally possible the guys were just bragging about their sizes, but still, the fact that my girlfriend now thinks that all my friends are significantly better endowed than me does get me all horny.

Towards the end of the night, one guy did mention that all their teasing was just for fun and I shouldn’t take it seriously, to which I replied that I had a ton of fun and most of it was actually true. Also, turns out my girlfriend and I ended up getting free drinks that night because “ladies and kiddos shouldn’t be paying when there’re men at the table.”

*****

So my alpha friend(I’ll call him Brad) and I use the same gym, and we occasionally bump into each other there. That day we made an impromptu post workout dinner plan, and since my gf stays close to the gym, I invited her to join us too. At the restaurant, my gf was the first to have a seat, and instead of letting me sit next to her, he quickly moved in to sit besides her. This was a narrow two seater booth/sofa kind of thing, so they had to sit pretty close, thigh to thigh. I was forced to sit opposite them. Throughout the meal, he was chatting up my girlfriend and hardly talked to me at all. At one point, he took her hands and commented on how small they were. This of course was just a ploy to get my gf to ask how big his hands are(and they’re quite big, btw). They compared hands, and my gf wasn’t able to cover even one of his hands completely with both of hers. After which, my gf tried the same thing with my hand, and since my hands are only very slightly larger than hers, the results were very different. The smirk Brad gave me when he saw that was really priceless.

“So I guess it’s true what they say about hand size, ehh t_w_p?”, he asked me, and my gf just tittered.

“I thought that was for feet size”, she said.

Brad: “Hmmm, what size shoes do you wear t_w_p?”

I said 7.5(it’s true BTW, and 7.5 US size is quite small).

Brad: “11.5 for me.”

GF: “Wow, so it atleast has some amount of truth to it. I always thought it was just an urban legend.”

T_W_P: “It IS an urban legend!!!”

By this time, I was so excited that I inadvertently said that a bit too emphatically, plus my voice was really high pitched when I said that. That evoked a shit ton of laughter from the two of them. As Brad had intended all along, he had managed to turn the topic to dick size and sex.

B: So, I don’t mean to pry, and sorry in advance for the personal question, but I feel I HAVE to ask. You guys can’t have penetrative sex, right? I mean, when I saw t_w_p’s cock, it was just this big. [holds fingers really close.] Like, it can’t get past the labia and into the pussy itself, right? So do you guys just have oral sex? Or do you use a dildo?

T_W_P: It was not erect when you barged into the bathroom, you asshole. It gets a lot bigger than that.

GF: Weeeeell…not a LOT bigger, but yea, he can atleast enter my pussy, though only just.

B: Well, it was your fault you left the door unlocked, shrimp dick. If you didn’t want your LITTLE secret to get out, you should have been more careful. So, GF, if he just about enters inside, does that do anything for you?

GF: Not his cock, but he’s great with his tongue and fingers.

B: Wait…so then you’ve never ever cum from T_W_P’s cock then?

GF: Can’t say I have.

B: That’s a real pity. All the chicks I’ve banged have told me it’s a completely different type of orgasm. More intense, lasts longer, feels different and so on.

T_W_P: [still trying to salvage the situation] Well babes, I guess I gotta try harder then, ehh? What say we give it a try at my place tonight?

B: Ohh, that’s not for you bro. You need more than 3″ for that. You stick to fingering, kiddo, and let the real men take care of this. [puts hands around GF’s shoulder.] What say you come to my place tonight GF? I’ll drop you back at T_W_P’s in the morning. He’s forgotten his post-workout protein shake today, I’ll load you up with my patent thick and juicy formula for his breakfast tomorrow. Or you can come to pick her up in the morning, T_W_P, and have your protein for the day straight from the source!

T_W_P: [half-heartedly attempts sarcasm] Huh! Never took you to be gay dude!!

B: Well, it’s gay only if it’s with another MAN. And to be a MAN you need to have a cock. Oversized clitties don’t qualify.

GF: [lightly and playfully slaps his wrist] BRAD !!!

B: Just kidding, just kidding…I swear. I mean…except the cock size part. A penile orgasm still requires more dick than T_W_P has. Sorry bro, but you are totally out of your depth here.

GF: [makes mock sad face] Awwwwww

T_W_P: [even giving up the pretense of being a man now] Don’t be sad babes, we’ll make Brad give you those orgasms. I’ll be in the room, taking notes and serving the master as he services you. Right Brad?

B: That’s right kiddo. Take copious notes, loads you can learn from the master. Don’t mind being your bull if you don’t mind being the cuck.

GF: Ewww, stop it you guys!!

B: Ok ok, so…changing the topic…….

That was all we talked about anything sex related that night. My gf went off to sleep at her apartment, so we didn’t spend the night together. She later said that she is definitely up for fucking Brad but she changed the topic that day as she didn’t want the conversation to continue before we had decided anything between ourselves. Judging from Brad’s reaction and knowledge of the terms, it looks like he might perhaps have some prior exposure to the cuckold lifestyle.

After giving this some thought, the gf and I have decided that I will initiate the conversation with Brad and ask(beg) him to fuck my GF.

 

The End.